Sunday, September 7, 2008

3 Things that Suck, with Videos

#1- Windows Vista. I got a brand new laptop that came with Vista installed. It crashes all the friggin' time! If microsoft wasn't such a huge, "incumbent" company, nobody would buy such a crappy product. I was a sucker, but y'all don't have to be. Buy a Mac for your next computer to teach those smug screwups at MS a lesson.



#2- Shorebreak. Fort Pierce beach is steep, and the waves don't break until right on the shore. If you just want to get out beyond the waves so you can sail in the open water, then you can launch your windsurf from the protected armpit of the Fort Pierce jetty. But today I wanted to try actually riding some waves, so I drove south on A1A towards a spot where I saw them breaking on an offshore bar. When I got there the shorebreak was pretty bad in spite of the bar, but I ignored my better judgement and rigged up anyway. Of course I got utterly smashed as soon as I entered the water and watched helplessly as my beloved Kona longboard and light wind wave sail were repeatedly thrown onto the beach and then sucked back into another pile-driving wall of sand and foam. Only when a particularly huge wave deposited the equipment relatively high on the beach did I dare try to grab it and pull it to safety. I was certain the rig was broken, and probably the board, to, but by some miracle everything was ok. I finished the day with a sunset session back in the safety of the armpit.



#3- Sarah Palin. Not because she's a woman, because her teenage daughter is pregnant, or even because she's made some hypocritical statements about porkbarrel spending. Sarah Palin sucks because she's anti-environment, anti-abortion in ALL cases (even for 12 year olds raped by relatives), anti-science (she denies global warming and wants biblical creation myths taught instead of evolution), anti-sex-education (it's needless to point out the irony of her abstinence-only philosophy), and a general, all-around lunatic. Basically, she's an ultra-religious nutjob who would be a nightmare as leader of the country, maybe even worse than Bush, if that's possible.



4 comments:

Farrah said...

yeah that reminds me of this laptop I got with Vista on it. It had a scary face recognition security feature in which the built-in camera focused on your eyeballs with white dots which made it seem possessed. I ended up downgrading back to XP and I can't tell you how relieved I was to have a normal operating system again.
Sarah Palin is scary, lol. The gossip blogs are all over her.
F

Johnny Douglass said...

I think Sarah Palin is gonna reduce taxes to Microsoft so they will be able to afford to produce better software for the benefit of all Americans. I don't know if she has a program for shore break but I think she has one to raise sea level so your launch location can be closer to your apartment.
Seriously, maybe you can return the computer or do like Farrah and thousands of others did and downgrade to XP.

PeconicPuffin said...

What a downer post!

:)

Hey life is too short to put up with Windows. It's bad enough that MS Word is an industry standard (remember years ago when GOOD word processors were available? My favorite was Write Now.)

Michael

James Douglass said...

Farrah- Yikes! At least my laptop isn't spying on me. I might do what you did with XP, though.

Dad- Ah, I guess Sarah Palin DOES have our best interests at heart.

Michael- Yeah, sometimes less is more. Microsoft forgets that. PS- I promise my next post won't be a downer. :)